PostCrazy

Get it? Like PostSecret? But mine's just about the fact that this is post #3 in 24 hours. GO INTERNET.
When it's this sticky and gross out, I tend to stay inside and avoid dealing with gross sweatiness outside unless completely necessary. (Side note: someone just knocked at my door at 8:30 on a Sunday night. Am I alone in refusing to answer the door unless I know someone's coming over?) That equals a lot of internet party time.
I've been having nightmares about secrets coming out, and just nightmares in general a lot in the past few days. Do you think that means anything? I generally fall into the "dream interpretation is bullshit" camp. But I'm open to suggestions that will make me feel better.
Since I know a few people who read this when they're at work and need something to do, let me throw a few things out there for more time-wasting fun.
Slate's Top 25 Bushisms of All Time. Still makes me giggle.
If you're a fan of JD Salinger and have read Franny & Zooey, I suggest this short review by John Updike from 1961. Simply because he's kind of an ass.
I don't know if these are as funny if you don't watch 30 Rock, but here's everything Tracy Jordan said in Season 3, completely out of context (and still hilarious).
Top 10 Food & Drink Hacks from LifeHacker.
World's Weirdest Animal Babies!
...enjoy.

Future of the Left - Travels with Myself and Another

Do yourself a favor and buy this record. My friend Anna introduced me to this band last year, when we went to New York to see them play with Against Me! and Ted Leo & the Pharmacists. The band's live show is fucking electric. I don't think I've ever been that taken with an artist or group on a first listen before. I've gotten pretty lazy about music in the past couple years; I still listen to my favorite albums from 5 years ago, and only buy records from bands I know that I'd like to support or records I know I'm going to love because I've already heard 'em before. Luckily, I have audiophile friends who push great music on me and some of that great music naturally enters into my collection. Some people might know part of the band from Mclusky, a band I'd never heard of until trying to understand where the hell FotL came from. The album's aggressive and a little odd, but completely worth listening the whole way though (and the whole way through a second, and third, time).
Here's Future of the Left on Myspace if you're curious.
Edit: here's the video for The Hope That House Built. I don't get it, but I still like it.

...and just like that, I lost my head.

Cheating. It's one of those things that carries such a huge stigma, and deservedly so. But it's also one of the most universal experiences in the world. Cheating and betrayal, which someone told me recently was "the one experience everyone can relate to." Now, before you try and talk me off a ledge, this isn't something that I'm particularly affected by right now, but it's just been cropping up in a few conversations lately and I've been thinking about it. I've been on every end of it; I've been cheated on, repeatedly. I cheated on my boyfriend, in retaliation for his infidelity (not the most mature response). I've been the girl that guys cheat on their girlfriends with. That one's the worst. Besides the self-loathing that comes with the package, you've got to worry about the other person finding out and punching you in the face. But sometimes the temptation is irresistible.
A few years ago, I was in a pretty unhealthy relationship. It was fun for a while, and then it was work, but I didn't want to give up because I was not that person. I was not the person who got invested in something and then just walked away, even when I knew it was the best thing for both of us. I think on some level neither one of us wanted to let the other down, and that's why it lasted for a year and a half longer than it should have. He wanted to be the boyfriend he thought I needed, and I wanted to change him so that he didn't end up dead in 5 years from an overdose or alcohol poisoning. Eventually, instead of deciding that it would be a good idea for us to go our separate ways, we moved in together. Millions of complications later, I found out that he'd cheated on me. And I proceeded to have a months-long affair with someone I worked with.
It wasn't just the thrill of knowing we could get caught at any point that kept it going. It was the basic idea that neither of us were getting what we wanted or needed out of our respective relationships, and while we did not want to be together in any real sense we also didn't want to risk being alone again. (unrelated: just found a sesame seed on my knee. can't remember the last time there was something with sesame seeds in my kitchen, and apparently I need to clean my cupboards.) I don't regret it. I regretted it when his girlfriend found out, I regretted it when I had to work with her almost every day for another month, and I probably felt bad for her for a little while. Not as bad as if she hadn't told me about the guys she'd been fucking for the past year of their relationship, but I did feel bad. We weren't friends, but we had a cordial relationship that worked smoothly. What I mean is that it was something that really did help me grow, and made me realize that I needed to be alone for a while. I had to get over that fear of not coming home to someone, or having someone to balance out the crazy in me when I get a wild idea. And I put up with a hell of a lot less now, which is also significant. Of course, I haven't really been in a relationship since that last boyfriend, which was almost 2 years ago now. I'm a little worried that I might finally understand too much about people, that really being happy with someone else is incredibly rare and complicated and hard to sustain. But I think I'm finally willing to try.
Edit: here's an article from today's New York Times about how marriages in the US are stronger than you'd think.

Keeping up appearances

Tonight, I couldn't sleep. I went to a barbecue this afternoon that got a little crazy, I went home, and had a nap. When I woke up, I could still feel the sticky 30 degree day on me (at writing time, 2:11am, it's still 26...an hour ago it was 29), so I took a shower. As much as I love showers at 11pm, they have the (generally fortunate) side effect of waking me up.
I digress. What I meant to say is hi, how are you, hope the kids are good, and I'm trying to be adventurous with this extra time of mine and changing things up here on this ol' internet web page thing. Patience, friends - hopefully I can get it looking neato soon. Just have to remember how to fuck around with HTML again first.

I'm trying to watch the Sopranos. Obviously it's groundbreaking and brilliant and blah blah blah, but I just can't get into it. Maybe it's because I'm using really old crappy quality .avi files, but this is the second or third time I've tried to watch it and I just get distracted. If anyone loves this show, tell me when I should just give up (I'm on episode 3 now), because I'm going to persevere and try to get through at least 6 episodes before I call it quits. So far it's just been a lot of stuff about ducks. And then someone gets killed. And there's some weird 60s music. That's all I've gotten so far.
I've been looking for a good edition of Trivial Pursuit for a few years now, and a few weeks ago a lovely friend of mine picked up the 80s Master Edition for me at a second-hand store. Since then, I've spent hours just reading the cards. I take a handful on the metro with me and test myself, seeing how many answers I can get. As always, I suck at the sports questions, I'm decent at politics, and I do well in music and news stories. I have noticed that there are a few reliable answers that I can fall back on:
-hockey questions are almost always Wayne Gretzky.
-anything about cars, and the car business, is Lee Iacocca.
-piano or musician questions are, 2/3 times, Liberace.
-anything about scandal? totally Iran-Contra.
There you go. Now you know the secret to me winning at this game for the rest of my life. I love board games. I love playing them, probably because I'm pretty good at it. My Achilles Heel is Risk; I refuse to play ever again. I am TERRIBLE and it is stress city. I've been trying to find a copy of A Question of Scruples for a while as well, but with no luck so far (if anyone ever sees one, plz pick it up and I will totally pay you back!). My best friend and I used to play it all the time growing up, and it always made me giggle. It's not even that great of an exercise in board game prowess, but the hypothetical situations those writers have come up with are hilarious. If you're unfamiliar with the game, it's basically a bunch of cards with "morally questionable" situations on them. Each player has 5 "question" cards (example: "You are walking down the street and a blind man in front of you drops a $5 bill. Do you stop him and give it back?") and 1 answer card with Yes, No, or Depends on it. The cards are read to another player that will hypothetically answer with a yes, no, or depends - you choose the person you're asking based on the answer card (y/n/d) you've got in your hand at that point. For example, if someone who knew me pretty well had that card, they'd ask me if they had a "no" answer card, and they'd ask a nun if they had a "yes" answer card. Get it? It's awesome. I don't know why it slays me so much, but it does, and if you ever get a chance to play I suggest you do it. If you get it for me for my birthday in a couple months, you can even come over and play with me.
This city is getting a lot nicer again. I love Montreal springtimes. Everyone decides that it's time to get outside, which (ignoring the assholes and inconsiderate idiots who don't understand how to walk/drive/bike) is pleasant. This is the 2-month window before it gets unbearably hot, so I'm trying to enjoy it as much as possible. I've got friends coming into town next weekend, then I'm hopefully off to Toronto the next weekend for NXNE. I'm not big on music festivals, but I realized that I've gone up this time of year for the past 3 years and I want to see some of the delightful people I know. It's unlikely that I'll be around again this summer, and this might be the trip I take instead of going back East again. I have many reasons to go back there, but right now I'm just not in the mood to deal with it. Funny how one person can ruin an entire trip, but I don't want to see that happen. Keeping it light and fun is the way to go, and I know that won't happen this time. That means I'm going to have to encourage everyone I like to come up here, but I think it's worth it. Besides, who doesn't want to take a trip to Montreal? That's right. No one.